tg.stone of tears- 第38部分

　
　Pasha　didn’t　flinch。　‘Yes；　Sister。　Thank　you　for　showing　me。’
　
　She　smiled　inwardly；　but　kept　it　off　her　face。　This　one　had　a　spine；　if　a　small　one。　A　rare　modity　in　a　novice；　even　one　of　the　third　rank。
　
　She　let　her　eyes　take　in　Pasha　again：　soft　brown　hair　that　just　touched　her　shoulders；　big　brown　eyes；　attractive　features；　lips　of　the　sort　men　stared　at；　proud；　upright　shoulders；　and　a　sweep　of　curves　that　even　a　novice’s　dress　failed　to　conceal。
　
　She　let　the　rod　trail　from　Pasha’s　chin；　down　her　neck；　down　into　the　heart　of　her　exposed　cleavage。
　
　Grown　into　a　man。
　
　‘And　since　when；　Pasha；’　she　said　in　a　quiet　voice　that　could　have　been　taken　for　either　threatening；　or　kind；　‘have　novices　been　allowed　to　wear　their　dresses　unbuttoned　like　this？’
　
　Pasha　blushed　furiously。　‘Forgive　me；　Sister。　It’s　such　a　warm　night。　I　was　alone　。。。　I　didn’t　think　there　was　anyone　about。　I　just　wanted　to　let　the　breeze　cool　my　skin。’　Her　face　turned　a　deeper　red。　‘I　sweat　so；　there。　I　never　meant　to　offend　anyone。　I’m　so　embarrassed。　Forgive　me。’
　
　Pasha’s　hands　rushed　to　the　buttons。　With　the　rod；　she　gently　pushed　the　hands　away　from　the　swell　of　the　young　woman’s　bosom。
　
　‘The　Creator　made　you　this　way。　You　should　not　be　embarrassed　of　what　He　has　chosen；’　in　his　wisdom；　to　bestow　upon　you。　You　should　never　be　ashamed；　Pasha；　of　what　He　has　graced　you　with。　Only　those　of　questionable　loyalty　to　the　Creator　would　scorn　you　for　being　proud　of　showing　the　Maker’s　hand　in　all　its　magnificence。’
　
　‘Why　。。。　thank　you；　Sister。　I　never　looked　at　it　in　quite　that　way。’　A　frown　wrinkled　her　brow。　‘What　do　you　mean；　‘questionable　loyalty’？’
　
　She　pulled　the　rod　away　and　lifted　an　eyebrow。　‘Those　who　worship　the　Nameless　One　don’t　hide　in　the　shadows；　my　dear。　They　could　be　anywhere。　Why；　even　you　could　be　one。　Even　me。’
　
　Pasha　fell　to　a　knee；　bowing　her　head。　‘Oh；　please；　Sister；’　she　implored；　‘don’t　say　such　a　thing　of　yourself；　even　in　jest。　You　are　a　Sister　of　the　Light；　and　we　are　in　the　Palace　of　the　Prophets；　safe；　I　pray；　from　the　whispers　of　the　Nameless　One。’
　
　‘Safe？’　With　her　rod；　she　motioned　the　novice　up。　After　she　was　on　her　feet；　she　gave　her　a　stern　look。　‘Only　a　fool　assumes　she　is　safe；　even　here。　Sisters　of　the　Light　are　not　fools。　Even　they　must　always　be　alert　to　the　dark　whispers。’
　
　‘Yes；　Sister。　I　will　remember。’
　
　‘Remember　it；　any　time　someone　would　make　you　ashamed　of　how　the　Creator　has　formed　you。　Ask　yourself　why　they　blush　at　seeing　the　Maker’s　hand。　Blush；　as　the　Nameless　One　would。’
　
　‘Yes；　Sister。　。。。　Thank　you；’　she　stammered。　‘You　have　given　me　things　to　think　on。　I　have　never　thought　about　the　Creator　in　this　way　before。’
　
　‘He　has　reasons　for　the　things　He　does。　Is　this　not　true？’
　
　‘What　do　you　mean？’
　
　‘Well；　when　He　gives　a　man　a　strong　back；　what　does　that　say？’
　
　‘Everyone　knows　that。　He　was　given　the　strong　back　to　use。　It　means　the　Creator　has　given　him　the　strong　back　so　that　he　might　work　to　feed　his　family。　Work　to　make　his　way。　Work　to　make　the　Creator　proud。　And　not　waste　the　Creator’s　gift　by　being　lazy。’
　
　She　whisked　the　rod　up　and　down　in　front　of　Pasha。　‘And　what　do　you　think　the　Creator　had　in　mind　when　he　gave　you　this　body？’
　
　‘I　。。。　don’t　know　。。。　exactly。　That　I　should　use　it　to　。。。　make　the　Creator　proud　of　His　work　。。。　in　some　way？’
　
　She　nodded。　‘You　think　on　it。　You　think　on　your　reason　for　being　here。　Being　here　at　this　time。　We　are　all　here　for　a　reason。　The　Sisters　of　the　Light　are　here　for　a　reason；　are　they　not？’
　
　‘Oh；　yes；　Sister。　We　are　here　to　teach　the　ones　with　the　gift；　teach　them　to　use　it；　and　guide　them　so　they　may　not　hear　the　whispers　of　the　Nameless　One；　that　they　may　hear　only　the　Creator。’
　
　‘And　how　are　we　able　to　do　that？’
　
　‘We　were　given　the　gift　of　being　sorceresses；　so　that　we　may　be　able　to　guide　them　in　their　gift。’
　
　‘And　if　the　Creator　was　wise　enough　to　give　you　that　gift；　the　gift　of　being　a　sorceress；　do　you　not　think　He　may　have　given　you　your　looks　for　a　reason　too？　Maybe　to　be　a　part　of　your　calling　as　a　Sister　of　the　Light？　To　use　your　looks　to　serve　Him？’
　
　Pasha　stared。　‘Why；　I　never　thought　of　it　that　way　before。　In　what　way　are　my　looks　to　be　of　aid？’
　
　She　shrugged。　‘We　cannot　always　know　what　the　Creator　has　intended。　When　He　wishes；　it　will　be　revealed。’
　
　‘Yes；　Sister。’　Her　voice　was　unsure。
　
　‘Pasha；　when　you　see　a　man　that　the　Creator　has　graced　with　good　looks；　a　finely　shaped　body；　what　do　you　think？　What　do　you　feel？’
　
　Pasha　blushed。　‘I　。。。　sometimes　。。。　it　makes　my　heart　race。　I　guess。　It　makes　me　feel。。。　good。　Feel　longings。’
　
　At　last　she　allowed　a　small　smile。　‘There　is　no　need　to　blush；　my　dear。　It　is　a　longing　to　touch　what　the　Creator’s　hand　has　wrought。　Don’t　you　suppose　it　pleases　the　Creator　that　you　appreciate　His　work？　Don’t　you　think　He　wants　you　to　like　what　He　has　done？　To　enjoy　it？　Just　as　you　must　know　that　men　enjoy　witnessing　your　beauty　and　long　to　touch　the　work　of　the　Creator’s　hand。　It　would　be　a　crime　against　the　Creator　not　to　use；　in　your　service　to　Him；　what　He　has　given　you。’
　
　Pasha　smiled　shyly。　‘I　never　thought　about　it　in　that　way。　You　have　given　me　new　eyes；　Sister。　The　more　I　learn；　the　more　it　seems　I　don’t　know。　I　hope　that　someday　I　will　be　a　Sister　of　the　Light　half　as　wise　as　you。’
　
　‘Knowledge　es　as　it　will；　Pasha。　Life’s　lessons　e　at　the　most　surprising　times。　Like　tonight。’　She　swished　the　rod　toward　the　window。　‘Here　you　are；　looking　out　a　window；　hoping　to　learn　one　thing；　and　you　have　learned　something　more　important。’
　
　Pasha　touched　her　arm。　‘Oh；　thank　you；　Sister；　for　taking　the　time　to　teach　me。　No　Sister　has　spoken　so　frankly　to　me　before。’
　
　‘This　is　one　lesson；　Pasha；　that　is　outside　the　palace　curriculum。　It　is　a　lesson　the　Nameless　One　would　be　angry　you　learned；　so　keep　it　to　yourself。　As　you　think　on　what　I　have　told　you；　and　the　Creator’s　hand　is　revealed；　you　will　understand　better　how　it　is　to　work　for　Him。　And　if　you　need　more　understanding；　I　will　always　be　here　to　help　guide　you。　But　keep　our　talk　from　others。　As　I　said；　you　can　never　tell　who　listens　to　the　whispers　of　the　Nameless　One。’
　
　Pasha　curtsied。　‘I　will；　Sister。　Thank　you。’
　
　A　novice　is　given　many　tests。　Tests　of　the　palace’s　devising。
　
　There　are　rules　to　them。　The　final　test　to　be　named　a　Sister　of　the　Light　is　being　charged　with　a　new　one。　In　this；　the　final　test；　there　are　not　always　rules。　New　ones　can　be　difficult　to　control。　But　that　does　not　mean　they　are　bad。’
　
　‘Difficult？’
　
　‘Of　course。　They　e　here；　plucked　from　the　only　life　they　knew；　and　are　thrust　into　a　new　place；　with　new　demands　they　don’t　understand。　They　can　be　rebellious；　difficult　to　control。　It　is　because　they　are　afraid。　We　must　have　patience。’
　
　‘Afraid　。。。？　Of　the　Sisters？　And　the　palace？’
　
　‘Weren’t　you　afraid；　when　you　first　came　here？　Just　a　little？’
　
　‘Well；　maybe　just　a　little。　But　it　was　my　dream　to　e。　I　wanted　it　more　than　anything。’
　
　‘For　the　new　ones；　it　is　not　always　their　dream。　They　are　confused　about　their　power。　With　you；　it　grew　as　you　grew。　You　were　accustomed　to　it；　it　was　part　of　you。　With　them；　it　is　sometimes　sudden；　unexpected。　Not　what　they　planned　or　wanted。　The　Rada’Han　can　ignite　the　power；　and　it　is　new　to　them。　It　can　be　frightening。　That　fear　makes　them　fight　it；　sometimes。　Fight　us。
　
　‘Your　job；　the　responsibility　of　a　novice　of　the　third　rank；　is　to　control　them；　for　their　own　good；　until　they　can　be　taught　by　the　Sisters。　In　all　your　other　lessons；　there　have　been　rules。　In　this；　there　sometimes　are　no　rules。　The　new　ones　don’t　know　of　our　rules　yet。　They　can　be　difficult　to　control　if　you　follow　only　the　rules　you　know。　Sometimes　the　collar　is　not　enough。　You　must　use　whatever　the　Creator　has　given　you。　You　must　be　able　to　do　whatever　it　takes　to　control　the　will　of　these　untrained　wizards。　That　is　the　true；　and　final　test　to　be　a　Sister。　Novices　have　failed　in　this　final　test；　and　been　put　out　of　the　palace。’
　
　Pasha’s　eyes　were　wide。　‘I　have　never　heard　such　things。’
　
　She　shrugged。　Then　I　have　been　of　aid　to　you。　I　am　pleased　the　Creator　has　chosen　me　to　help。　Perhaps　others　have　not　wanted　so　strongly　for　you　to　succeed；　and　have　held　back。　Perhaps　you　would　do　well　to　bring　to　me　your　questions　about　any　new　one　you　are　assigned。’
　
　‘Oh；　yes。　Thank　you　for　your　help；　Sister。　I　must　admit　it　worries　me　to　learn　that　new　ones　can　be　difficult。　I　guess　I　always　imagined　they　would　be　eager　to　learn；　and　that　it　would　be　a　joy　to　show　them　and　to　help　teach　them。’
　
　They　are　all　different。　Some　are　as　easy　as　a　babe　in　a　crib。　Let　us　hope　you　are　given　one　like　that。　Some　will　test　your　wits。　Why；　I　have　even　seen　old　records　that　tell　of　ones　that　have　triggered　the　gift　before　we　could　get　to　them；　before　we　could　get　a　Rada’Han　on　them　and　help　them。’
　
　‘No　。。。　That　must　be　frightening　for　them　…　to　have　the　power　awakened　without　guidance　from　us。’
　
　‘Indeed。　And　fear　can　make　them　troublesome；　as　I　have　said。　I　have　even　seen　an　old　report　of　one　who　refused　the　collar　on　the　first　offer。’
　
　Pasha’s　fingers　covered　her　mouth　as　she　gasped。　She　took　them　away。　‘But。。。　that　means。。。　one　of　the　Sisters　。。。’
　
　She　nodded　solemnly。　‘It　is　a　price　we　are　all　prepared　to　pay。　We　bear　a　heavy　responsibility。’
　
　‘But　why　wouldn’t　the　parents　make　him　accept　the　offer？’
　
　She　leaned　closer；　lowering　her　voice。　Tn　the　report　I　saw；　the　one　with　the　gift　was　grown。　A　man。’
　
　Pasha　stared　in　wide…eyed　disbelief。　A　man　。。。？’　she　whispered。　‘If　a　boy　can　be　difficult　to　control　。。。　what　of　a　grown　man？’
　
　She　gave　the　novice　an　even　look。　‘We　are　here　to　serve　in　the　Creator’s　work。　You　can　never　tell　what　the　Creator　has　in　His　plan；　why　you　are　given　what　you　have。　A　novice　in　charge　of　a　new　one　must　use　whatever　the　Creator　has　given　her。　The　collar　is　not　always　enough。　You　can　never　tell　what　you　might　need　to　do。　The　rules　don’t　always　work。
　
　‘Do　you　still　want　to　be　a　Sister　of　the　Light？　Even　knowing　you　may　be　given　a　new　one　who　could　be　more　difficult　than　any　other　novice　has　ever　been　given？’
　
　‘Oh；　yes！　Yes；　Sister！　If　the　new　one　is　difficult；　I　know　it　is　a　test　from　the　Creator　himself；　to　see　if　I　am　truly　worthy。　I　will　not　fail。　I　will　do　whatever　must　be　done。　I　will　use　everything　I　have　learned；　everything　the　Creator　has　given　me。　I　will　be　on　guard　that　he　may　be　from　a　strange　land；　or　have　strange　customs；　and　be　afraid；　or　troublesome；　or　difficult。　And　that　I　may　have　to　make　my　own　rules　to　succeed。’　She　hesitated。　‘And　if　you　are　so　kind　as　to　mean　what　you　said　about　helping　me；　then　I　know　I　will　have　your　wisdom　backing　me；　and　I　will　not　fail。’
　
　She　nodded　with　a　smile。　‘I　have　given　my　word。　It　holds；　no　matter　the　difficulty。’　She　frowned　in　thought。　‘Perhaps；　it　could　be　that　you　are　graced　with　your　looks　so　a　new　one　might