been。 “I think it’s perfect。”
Lily smiled and Christian smiled and together we set off for Au Bar。
Christian Collinsworth and I were going to get a drink together。 Did
this qualify as a date？Of course not； don’t be ridiculous； I berated
myself。Alex； Alex； Alex； I silently chanted； both determined to
remember that I had a very loving boyfriend and disappointed with
myself for having to force myself to remember that I had a very
loving boyfriend。
Even though it was a random Thursday night； the velvet rope police
were out in full force； and； while they had no problem letting the
three of us in； no one was offering reduced admission of any sort：
twenty bucks just to get in the door。
But before I could hand over my cash； Christian deftly peeled three
twenties from a huge wad he pulled from his pocket and handed them
over without a word。
I tried to protest； but Christian put two fingers to my lips。
“Darling Andy； don’t worry your pretty little head about it。” And
before I could move my mouth out from underneath his touch； he
reached his other hand behind my head and took my face in both
hands。 Somewhere deep in the recesses of my pletely addled brain；
the firing synapses were warning me that he was going to kiss me。 I
knew it； sensed it； but couldn’t move。 He took my split…second
hesitation to move away as permission； leaned over； and touched his
lips to my neck。 Just quickly； a brush； really； with perhaps a
little tongue； right underneath my jaw and near my ear but still
firmly on the neck； and then he reached for my hand and pulled me
inside。
“Christian； wait！ I； uh； I need to tell you something；” I started；
not quite sure whether one uninvited； nonlip； minimal…tongue kiss
really demanded a whole long explanation of having a boyfriend and
not meaning to send the wrong signals。 Apparently Christian didn’t
think it was necessary； because he had walked me to a couch in a
dark corner and ordered me to sit。 Which I did。
“I’m getting us drinks； OK？ Don’t worry so much。 I don’t bite。” He
laughed； and I felt myself turn red。 “Or； if I do； I promise you’ll
enjoy it。” And he turned and walked toward the bar。
To keep from passing out or having to actually consider what had
just transpired； I scanned the dark； cavernous room for Lily。 We’d
been there less than three minutes； but she was already deep in
conversation with a tall black guy； hanging on his every word and
throwing her head back with delight。 I weaved through the throngs of
international drinkers。 How did they all know that this was the
place to e if you didn’t have an American passport？ I passed a
group of men in their thirties shouting in what I think was
Japanese； two women flapping their hands and talking passionately in
Arabic； and a young； unhappy…looking couple glaring at each other
and whispering angrily in something that sounded like Spanish but
could have been Portuguese。 Lily’s guy had his hand on the small of
her back already and was looking utterly charmed。 No time for
niceties； I decided。 Christian Collinsworth had just massaged my
neck with his mouth。 Ignoring the guy； I clamped my hand down on her
right arm and turned to drag her back to the couch。
“Andy！ Stop it；” she hissed； pulling her arm free but remembering to
smile for her guy。 “You’re being rude。 I’d like to introduce you to
my friend。 William； this is my best friend； Andrea； who doesn’t
usually act like this。 Andy； this is William。” She smiled
benevolently as we shook hands。
“So； may I ask why you’re stealing your friend from me； Ahn…dre…ah？”
William asked in a deep voice that almost echoed in the subterranean
space。 Perhaps in another place or at another time or with another
person I would’ve noticed his warm smile or the chivalrous way he’d
immediately stood and offered his seat when I approached； but the
only thing I could focus on was that British accent。 Didn’t matter
that this was a man； a large black man； who didn’t exactly resemble
Miranda Priestly in any way； shape； or form。 Just hearing that
accent； the way he pronounced my namejust like she did； was enough
to literally make my heart beat a little faster。
“William； I’m sorry； it’s nothing personal。 It’s just that I have a
little problem and I’d like to talk to Lily in private。 I’ll bring
her right back。” And with that； I grabbed her arm more firmly this
time and yanked。 Enough of this shit： I needed my friend。
Once we’d settled into the couch where Christian had placed me and I
checked to ensure he was still trying to get the bartender’s
attention （straight guy at the bar—he may be there all night）； I
took a deep breath。
“Christian kissed me。”
“So what’s the problem？ Was he a bad kisser？ Oh； that’s it； isn’t
it？ No quicker way to ruin a good fraction than—”
“Lily！ Good； bad； what’s the difference？”
Her eyebrows reached up her forehead and she opened her mouth to
talk； but I kept going。
“And not that it’s at all relevant； but he kissed my neck。 The
problem is nothow he did； it’s that it happened at all in the first
place。 What about Alex？ I don’t exactly go around kissing other
guys； you know。”
“Don’t I ever；” she mumbled under her breath before speaking up。
“Andy； you’re being ridiculous。 You love Alex and he loves you； but
it’s perfectly okay if you feel like kissing another guy once in a
while。 You’re twenty…three years old； for chrissake。 Cut yourself a
little slack！”
“But I didn’t kiss him 。 。 。 He kissed me！”
“First of all； let’s get something very clear。 Remember when Monica
went down on Bill and the whole country and all our parents and Ken
Starr rushed to call that sex？ That was not sex。 In much the same
way； some guy who probably means to kiss your cheek but gets your
neck instead does not qualify as ‘kissing someone。’ ”
“But—”
“Shut up and let me finish。 More important than what actually
happened is that you wanted it to happen。 Just admit it； Andy。 You
wanted to kiss Christian regardless of whether that’s ‘wrong’ or
‘bad’ or ‘against the rules。’ And if you don’t admit it； you’re
lying。”
“Lily； seriously； I don’t think it’s fair that—”
“I’ve known you for nine years； Andy。 You don’t think I can see it
written all over your face that you worship him？ You know you
shouldn’t—he doesn’t quite play by your rules； does he？ But that’s
probably exactly why you like him。 Just go with it； enjoy it。 If
Alex is right for you； he’ll always be right for you。 And now；
you’ll have to excuse me； because I have found someone who’s right
for me 。 。 。 for right now。” She literally jumped off the couch and
skipped back to William； who looked undeniably happy to see her。
I felt self…conscious sitting on the oversize velvet couch alone and
looked around to find Christian； but he wasn’t at the bar anymore。
It would just take a little more time； I decided。 Everything would
just sort itself out if I just stopped worrying so much。 Maybe Lily
was right and I did like Christian—what was so wrong with that？ He’s
smart and undeniably gorgeous； and the whole take…charge confidence
thing was incredibly sexy。 Hanging out with someone who just
happened to be sexy didn’t exactly translate as cheating。 I’m sure
there had been situations over the years in which Alex had worked
with or studied with or gotten to know a cool； attractive girl； and
he may have had thoughts。 Did that make him disloyal？ Of course not。
With renewed confidence （and a now…desperate attempt to see； watch；
hear； just be near Christian again）； I began cruising the lounge。
I found him leaning on his right hand； talking intently to an older
man； probably in his late forties； who was wearing a very dapper
three…piece suit。 Christian was gesturing wildly； hands flailing；
with a look on his face that registered somewhere between amused and
supremely annoyed； while the man with salt…and…pepper hair looked at
him earnestly。 I was still too far away to hear what they were
discussing； but I must have been staring rather intently； because
the man’s eyes locked on mine and he smiled。 Christian pulled back a
little； followed his gaze； and saw me watching them both。
“Andy； darling；” he said； his tone entirely different from what it
had been just a few minutes earlier。 I noticed he made the
transition from seducer to friend of your parent quite smoothly。
“e here； I’d like you to meet a friend of mine。 This is Gabriel
Brooks； my agent； Business manager； and all…around hero。 Gabriel；
this is Andrea Sachs； currently ofRunway magazine。”
“Andrea； a pleasure to meet you；” Gabriel said； extending a hand and
taking mine in one of those annoyingly delicate
I’m…not…shaking…your…hand…as…I…would…a…man’s…because…I’m…sure…I’d…just…snap…your…girly…little…bones…in…half
clutches。 “Christian has told me a lot about you。”
“Really？” I said； pressing a bit more firmly； which only caused him
to loosen his already slack grip。 “All good； I hope？”
“Of course。 He said you’re an aspiring writer； like our mutual
friend here。” He smiled。
I was surprised to hear that he actually had heard about me from
Christian； since our conversation about writing had sounded like
just small talk。 “Yes； well； I love to write； so hopefully someday 。
。 。”
“Well； if you’re half as good as some of the other people he’s sent
my way； then I look forward to reading your work。” He dug around in
an inside pocket and produced a leather case； from which he drew out
a Business card。 “I know you’re not ready yet； but when it does e
time to show your stuff to someone； I hope you’ll keep me in mind。”
It took every ounce of willpower and strength to remain standing
upright； to make sure that my mouth had not flopped open or my knees
had not just given out。Hope you’ll keep me in mind？ The man who
represented Christian Collinsworth； literary boy genius
extraordinaire； had just asked if I would keep him in mind。 This was
craziness。
“Why thank you；” I croaked； tucking the card into my bag； from where
I knew I would pull it out and examine every inch of it the first
chance I got。 They both smiled at me； and it took a minute for me to
recognize this as my cue to leave。 “Well； Mr。 Brooks； um； Gabriel；
it was really great meeting you。 I’ve got to be getting Home now；
but hopefully we’ll cross paths soon。”
“My pleasure； Andrea。 Con