'Oh; I don't know what to say!' she answered; distressed。 'You didn't
like this young man; Fanny?'
'Like him? He is almost an idiot。'
'I am so sorry……don't be hurt……but; since you ask me what I have to
say; I am so very sorry; Fanny; that you suffered this lady to give you
anything。'
'You little Fool!' returned her sister; shaking her with the sharp pull
she gave her arm。 'Have you no spirit at all? But that's just the way!
You have no self…respect; you have no being pride; just as you allow
yourself to be followed about by a contemptible little Chivery of a
thing;' with the scornfullest emphasis; 'you would let your family be
trodden on; and never turn。'
'Don't say that; dear Fanny。 I do what I can for them。'
'You do what you can for them!' repeated Fanny; walking her on very
fast。 'Would you let a woman like this; whom you could see; if you had
any experience of anything; to be as false and insolent as a woman can
be……would you let her put her foot upon your family; and thank her for
it?'
'No; Fanny; I am sure。' 'Then make her pay for it; you mean little
thing。 What else can you make her do? Make her pay for it; you stupid
child; and do your family some credit with the money!'
They spoke no more all the way back to the lodging where Fanny and her
uncle lived。 When they arrived there; they found the old man practising
his clario in the dolefullest manner in a corner of the room。
Fanny had a posite meal to make; of chops; and porter; and tea; and
indignantly pretended to prepare it for herself; though her sister did
all that in quiet reality。 When at last Fanny sat down to eat and drink;
she threw the table implements about and was angry with her bread; much
as her father had been last night。
'If you despise me;' she said; bursting into vehement tears; 'because I
am a dancer; why did you put me in the way of being one?
It was your doing。 You would have me stoop as low as the ground before
this Mrs Merdle; and let her say what she liked and do what she liked;
and hold us all in contempt; and tell me so to my face。 Because I am a
dancer!'
'O Fanny!'
'And Tip; too; poor fellow。 She is to disparage him just as much as she
likes; without any check……I suppose because he has been in the law; and
the docks; and different things。 Why; it was your doing; Amy。 You might
at least approve of his being defended。'
All this time the uncle was dolefully blowing his clario in the
corner; sometimes taking it an inch or so from his mouth for a moment
while he stopped to gaze at them; with a vague impression that somebody
had said something。
'And your father; your poor father; Amy。 Because he is not free to show
himself and to speak for himself; you would let such people insult him
with impunity。 If you don't feel for yourself because you go out to
work; you might at least feel for him; I should think; knowing what he
has undergone so long。'
Poor Little Dorrit felt the injustice of this taunt rather sharply。
The remembrance of last night added a barbed point to it。 She said
nothing in reply; but turned her chair from the table towards the fire。
Uncle; after making one more pause; blew a dismal wail and went on
again。
Fanny was passionate with the tea…cups and the bread as long as her
passion lasted; and then protested that she was the wretchedest girl in
the world; and she wished she was dead。 After that; her crying became
remorseful; and she got up and put her arms round her sister。 Little
Dorrit tried to stop her from saying anything; but she answered that
she would; she must! Thereupon she said again; and again; 'I beg your
pardon; Amy;' and 'Forgive me; Amy;' almost as passionately as she had
said what she regretted。
'But indeed; indeed; Amy;' she resumed when they were seated in sisterly
accord side by side; 'I hope and I think you would have seen this
differently; if you had known a little more of Society。'
'Perhaps I might; Fanny;' said the mild Little Dorrit。
'You see; while you have been domestic and resignedly shut up there;
Amy;' pursued her sister; gradually beginning to patronise; 'I have
been out; moving more in Society; and may have been getting proud and
spirited……more than I ought to be; perhaps?'
Little Dorrit answered 'Yes。 O yes!'
'And while you have been thinking of the dinner or the clothes; I may
have been thinking; you know; of the family。 Now; may it not be so;
Amy?'
Little Dorrit again nodded 'Yes;' with a more cheerful face than heart。
'Especially as we know;' said Fanny; 'that there certainly is a tone in
the place to which you have been so true; which does belong to it; and
which does make it different from other aspects of Society。 So kiss me
once again; Amy dear; and we will agree that we may both be right; and
that you are a tranquil; domestic; home…loving; good girl。'
The clario had been lamenting most pathetically during this dialogue;
but was cut short now by Fanny's announcement that it was time to go;
which she conveyed to her uncle by shutting up his scrap of music; and
taking the clario out of his mouth。
Little Dorrit parted from them at the door; and hastened back to the
Marshalsea。 It fell dark there sooner than elsewhere; and going into it
that evening was like going into a deep trench。 The shadow of the wall
was on every object。 Not least upon the figure in the old grey gown and
the black velvet cap; as it turned towards her when she opened the door
of the dim room。
'Why not upon me too!' thought Little Dorrit; with the door Yet in her
hand。 'It was not unreasonable in Fanny。'
CHAPTER 21。 Mr Merdle's plaint
Upon that establishment of state; the Merdle establishment in Harley
Street; Cavendish Square; there was the shadow of no more mon wall
than the fronts of other establishments of state on the opposite side of
the street。 Like unexceptionable Society; the opposing rows of houses in
Harley Street were very grim with one another。 Indeed; the mansions and
their inhabitants were so much alike in that respect; that the people
were often to be found drawn up on opposite sides of dinner…tables; in
the shade of their own loftiness; staring at the other side of the way
with the dullness of the houses。
Everybody knows how like the street the two dinner…rows of people who
take their stand by the street will be。 The expressionless uniform
twenty houses; all to be knocked at and rung at in the same form; all
approachable by the same dull steps; all fended off by the same pattern
of railing; all with the same impracticable fire…escapes; the same
inconvenient fixtures in their heads; and everything without exception
to be taken at a high valuation……who has not dined with these? The
house so drearily out of repair; the occasional bow…window; the stuccoed
house; the newly…fronted house; the corner house with nothing but
angular rooms; the house with the blinds always down; the house with the
hatchment always up; the house where the collector has called for one
quarter of an Idea; and found nobody at home……who has not dined with
these? The house that nobody will take; and is to be had a bargain……who
does not know her? The showy house that was taken for life by the
disappointed gentleman; and which does not suit him at all……who is
unacquainted with that haunted habitation?
Harley Street; Cavendish Square; was more than aware of Mr and Mrs
Merdle。 Intruders there were in Harley Street; of whom it was not aware;
but Mr and Mrs Merdle it delighted to honour。 Society was aware of
Mr and Mrs Merdle。 Society had said 'Let us license them; let us know
them。'
Mr Merdle was immensely rich; a man of prodigious enterprise; a
Midas without the ears; who turned all he touched to gold。 He was in
everything good; from banking to building。 He was in Parliament; of
course。 He was in the City; necessarily。 He was Chairman of this;
Trustee of that; President of the other。 The weightiest of men had said
to projectors; 'Now; what name have you got? Have you got Merdle?' And;
the reply being in the negative; had said; 'Then I won't look at you。'
This great and fortunate man had provided that extensive bosom which
required so much room to be unfeeling enough in; with a nest of crimson
and gold some fifteen years before。 It was not a bosom to repose
upon; but it was a capital bosom to hang jewels upon。 Mr Merdle wanted
something to hang jewels upon; and he bought it for the purpose。 Storr
and Mortimer might have married on the same speculation。
Like all his other speculations; it was sound and successful。 The jewels
showed to the richest advantage。 The bosom moving in Society with
the jewels displayed upon it; attracted general admiration。 Society
approving; Mr Merdle was satisfied。 He was the most disinterested of
men;……did everything for Society; and got as little for himself out of
all his gain and care; as a man might。
That is to say; it may be supposed that he got all he wanted; otherwise
with unlimited wealth he would have got it。 But his desire was to the
utmost to satisfy Society (whatever that was); and take up all its
drafts upon him for tribute。 He did not shine in pany; he had not
very much to say for himself; he was a reserved man; with a broad;
overhanging; watchful head; that particular kind of dull red colour
in his cheeks which is rather stale than fresh; and a somewhat uneasy
expression about his coat…cuffs; as if they were in his confidence; and
had reasons for being anxious to hide his hands。 In the little he said;
he was a pleasant man enough; plain; emphatic about public and private
confidence; and tenacious of the utmost deference being shown by every
one; in all things; to Society。 In this same Society (if that were it
which came to his dinners; and to Mrs Merdle's receptions and concerts);
he hardly seemed to enjoy himself much; and was mostly to be found
against walls and behind doors。 Also when he went out to it; instead of
its ing home to him; he seemed a little fatigued; and upon the
whole rather more disposed for bed; but he was always cultivating it
nevertheless; and always moving in it……and always laying out money on it
with the greatest liberality。
Mrs Merdle's first husband had been a colonel; under whose auspices the
bosom had entered into petition with the snows of North America; and
had e off at little disadvantage in point of whiteness; and at none
in point of coldness。 The colonel's son was Mrs Merdle's only child。 He
was of a chuckle…headed; high…shouldered make; with a general appearance
of being; not so much a young man as a swelled boy。 He had given so few
signs of reason; that a by…word went among his panions that his brain
had been frozen up in a mighty frost which prevailed at St john's; New
Brunswick; at the period of his birth there; and had never thawed from
that hour。 Another by…word represented him as having in his infancy;
through the negligence of a nurse; fallen out of a high window on his
head; which had been heard by responsible witnesses to crack。 It is
probable that both these representations were of ex post facto
origin; the young gentleman (whose expressive name was Sparkler) being
monomaniacal in offering marriage to all manner of undesirable young
ladie
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