madame； have you limited and settled the price the little niece will
give……for his sake……to hush it up？ Once more I say； time presses。 The
packet not reclaimed before the ringing of the bell to…night； you cannot
buy。 I sell； then； to the little girl！'
Once more the stir and struggle in her； and she ran to a closet； tore
the door open； took down a hood or shawl； and wrapped it over her head。
Affery； who had watched her in terror； darted to her in the middle of
the room； caught hold of her dress； and went on her knees to her。
'Don't； don't； don't！ What are you doing？ Where are you going？ You're a
fearful woman； but I don't bear you no ill…will。 I can do poor Arthur
no good now； that I see； and you needn't be afraid of me。 I'll keep your
secret。 Don't go out； you'll fall dead in the street。 Only promise me；
that； if it's the poor thing that's kept here secretly； you'll let me
take charge of her and be her nurse。 Only promise me that； and never be
afraid of me。'
Mrs Clennam stood still for an instant； at the height of her rapid
haste； saying in stern amazement：
'Kept here？ She has been dead a score of years or more。 Ask
Flintwinch……ask HIM。 They can both tell you that she died when Arthur
went abroad。'
'So much the worse；' said Affery； with a shiver； 'for she haunts the
house； then。 Who else rustles about it； making signals by dropping
dust so softly？ Who else es and goes； and marks the walls with
long crooked touches when we are all a…bed？ Who else holds the door
sometimes？ But don't go out……don't go out！ Mistress； you'll die in the
street！'
Her mistress only disengaged her dress from the beseeching hands； said
to Rigaud； 'Wait here till I e back！' and ran out of the room。 They
saw her； from the window； run wildly through the court…yard and out at
the gateway。
For a few moments they stood motionless。 Affery was the first to move；
and she； wringing her hands； pursued her mistress。 Next； Jeremiah
Flintwinch； slowly backing to the door； with one hand in a pocket； and
the other rubbing his chin； twisted himself out in his reticent way；
speechlessly。 Rigaud； left alone； posed himself upon the window…seat
of the open window； in the old Marseilles…jail attitude。 He laid his
cigarettes and fire…box ready to his hand； and fell to smoking。
'Whoof！ Almost as dull as the infernal old jail。 Warmer； but almost as
dismal。 Wait till she es back？ Yes； certainly； but where is she gone；
and how long will she be gone？ No matter！ Rigaud Lagnier Blandois； my
amiable subject； you will get your money。 You will enrich yourself。 You
have lived a gentleman； you will die a gentleman。 You triumph； my little
boy； but it is your character to triumph。 Whoof！' In the hour of his
triumph； his moustache went up and his nose came down； as he ogled a
great beam over his head with particular satisfaction。
CHAPTER 31。 Closed
The sun had set； and the streets were dim in the dusty twilight； when
the figure so long unused to them hurried on its way。 In the immediate
neighbourhood of the old house it attracted little attention； for there
were only a few straggling people to notice it； but； ascending from the
river by the crooked ways that led to London Bridge； and passing into
the great main road； it became surrounded by astonishment。
Resolute and wild of look； rapid of foot and yet weak and uncertain；
conspicuously dressed in its black garments and with its hurried
head…covering； gaunt and of an unearthly paleness； it pressed forward；
taking no more heed of the throng than a sleep…walker。 More remarkable
by being so removed from the crowd it was among than if it had been
lifted on a pedestal to be seen； the figure attracted all eyes。
Saunterers pricked up their attention to observe it； busy people；
crossing it； slackened their pace and turned their heads； panions
pausing and standing aside； whispered one another to look at this
spectral woman who was ing by； and the sweep of the figure as it
passed seemed to create a vortex； drawing the most idle and most curious
after it。
Made giddy by the turbulent irruption of this multitude of staring faces
into her cell of years； by the confusing sensation of being in the air；
and the yet more confusing sensation of being afoot； by the unexpected
changes in half…remembered objects； and the want of likeness between the
controllable pictures her imagination had often drawn of the life from
which she was secluded and the overwhelming rush of the reality； she
held her way as if she were environed by distracting thoughts； rather
than by external humanity and observation。 But； having crossed the
bridge and gone some distance straight onward； she remembered that she
must ask for a direction； and it was only then； when she stopped and
turned to look about her for a promising place of inquiry； that she
found herself surrounded by an eager glare of faces。
'Why are you encircling me？' she asked； trembling。
None of those who were nearest answered； but from the outer ring there
arose a shrill cry of ''Cause you're mad！'
'I am sure as sane as any one here。 I want to find the Marshalsea
prison。'
The shrill outer circle again retorted； 'Then that 'ud show you was mad
if nothing else did； 'cause it's right opposite！'
A short； mild； quiet…looking young man made his way through to her； as
a whooping ensued on this reply； and said： 'Was it the Marshalsea you
wanted？ I'm going on duty there。 e across with me。'
She laid her hand upon his arm； and he took her over the way； the crowd；
rather injured by the near prospect of losing her； pressing before and
behind and on either side； and remending an adjournment to Bedlam。
After a momentary whirl in the outer court…yard； the prison…door opened；
and shut upon them。 In the Lodge； which seemed by contrast with the
outer noise a place of refuge and peace； a yellow lamp was already
striving with the prison shadows。
'Why； John！' said the turnkey who admitted them。 'What is it？'
'Nothing； father； only this lady not knowing her way； and being badgered
by the boys。 Who did you want； ma'am？'
'Miss Dorrit。 Is she here？'
The young man became more interested。 'Yes； she is here。 What might your
name be？'
'Mrs Clennam。'
'Mr Clennam's mother？' asked the young man。
She pressed her lips together； and hesitated。 'Yes。 She had better be
told it is his mother。'
'You see；' said the young man；'the Marshal's family living in the
country at present； the Marshal has given Miss Dorrit one of the rooms
in his house to use when she likes。 Don't you think you had better e
up there； and let me bring Miss Dorrit？'
She signified her assent； and he unlocked a door and conducted her up
a side staircase into a dwelling…house above。 He showed her into a
darkening room； and left her。 The room looked down into the darkening
prison…yard； with its inmates strolling here and there； leaning out
of windows muning as much apart as they could with friends who were
going away； and generally wearing out their imprisonment as they best
might that summer evening。 The air was heavy and hot； the closeness
of the place； oppressive； and from without there arose a rush of
free sounds； like the jarring memory of such things in a headache and
heartache。 She stood at the window； bewildered； looking down into this
prison as it were out of her own different prison； when a soft word or
two of surprise made her start； and Little Dorrit stood before her。
'Is it possible； Mrs Clennam； that you are so happily recovered as……'
Little Dorrit stopped； for there was neither happiness nor health in the
face that turned to her。 'This is not recovery； it is not strength； I
don't know what it is。' With an agitated wave of her hand； she put all
that aside。 'You have a packet left with you which you were to give to
Arthur； if it was not reclaimed before this place closed to…night。'
'Yes。'
'I reclaim it。'
Little Dorrit took it from her bosom； and gave it into her hand； which
remained stretched out after receiving it。
'Have you any idea of its contents？'
Frightened by her being there with that new power Of Movement in her；
which； as she said herself； was not strength； and which was unreal
to look upon； as though a picture or statue had been animated； Little
Dorrit answered 'No。'
'Read them。'
Little Dorrit took the packet from the still outstretched hand； and
broke the seal。 Mrs Clennam then gave her the inner packet that was
addressed to herself； and held the other。 The shadow of the wall and of
the prison buildings； which made the room sombre at noon； made it too
dark to read there； with the dusk deepening apace； save in the window。
In the window； where a little of the bright summer evening sky
could shine upon her； Little Dorrit stood； and read。 After a broken
exclamation or so of wonder and of terror； she read in silence。 When
she had finished； she looked round； and her old mistress bowed herself
before her。
'You know； now； what I have done。'
'I think so。 I am afraid so； though my mind is so hurried； and so sorry；
and has so much to pity that it has not been able to follow all I have
read；' said Little Dorrit tremulously。
'I will restore to you what I have withheld from you。 Forgive me。 Can
you forgive me？'
'I can； and Heaven knows I do！ Do not kiss my dress and kneel to me； you
are too old to kneel to me； I forgive you freely without that。'
'I have more yet to ask。'
'Not in that posture；' said Little Dorrit。 'It is unnatural to see your
grey hair lower than mine。 Pray rise； let me help you。' With that she
raised her up； and stood rather shrinking from her； but looking at her
earnestly。
'The great petition that I make to you （there is another which grows
out of it）； the great supplication that I address to your merciful and
gentle heart； is； that you will not disclose this to Arthur until I am
dead。 If you think； when you have had time for consideration； that it
can do him any good to know it while I am yet alive； then tell him。 But
you will not think that； and in such case； will you promise me to spare
me until I am dead？'
'I am so sorry； and what I have read has so confused my thoughts；'
returned Little Dorrit； 'that I can scarcely give you a steady answer。
If I should be quite sure that to be acquainted with it will do Mr
Clennam no good……'
'I know you are attached to him； and will make him the first
consideration。 It is right that he should be the first consideration。 I
ask that。 But； having regarded him； and still finding that you may spare
me for the little time I shall remain on earth； will you do it？'
'I will。'
'GOD bless you！'
She stood in the shadow so that she was only a veiled form to Little
Dorrit in the light； but the sound of her voice； in saying those three
grateful words； was at once fervent and broken……broken by emotion as
unfamiliar to her frozen eyes as action to her frozen limbs。
'You will wonder； perhaps；' she said in a stronger tone； 'that I can
better bear to be known to you whom I have wronged； than to the son
of my enemy who wronged me。……For she did wrong me！ She not only sinned
grievously against the Lord； but she wronged me。 What Arthur's father
was to me； she made him。 From our marriage day